Blog Posts

Stoke City		Boro
Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	62% 13 1 7 8	Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	38% 11 4 2 10

Goalless in the Potteries

Boro’s tea-time trip to the Potteries had a bit of extra edge with the return of Tony Pulis to the club where he spent nearly ten years as the Manager who last guided them to the Premiership. Boro’s resolute defiance against Palace mid-week I’m sure will have resonated with Gary Rowett on what his side have to do to try and get one over TP. Creativity and the lack of it seems to be something that his Stoke side have been criticised for lately. It’s also something that has been levelled at TP’s Boro side this season as blank sheets became the norm for his strike force in October.

Stoke had conceded just two goals in their last five games so low scoring Boro on paper were unlikely to cause much consternation for Jack Butland. Like Boro their defence is the foundation that Rowett is building his side upon and again like Boro they have been in for some stick for being too slow in getting the ball out from the back to attack with any tempo. On Wednesday night it has been much debated on social media that perhaps TP’s solution to the lack of goals and creativity was staring at him out on the pitch. After such a strong case it will be interesting to see who makes the starting eleven and who makes the bench considering that Ayala is suspended for this one and both McQueen and Shotton are out injured so there should be at least two spare seats on the subs bench and with it a feasible reasoning for inclusion of our young talent.

As we had hoped there were indeed two seats reserved on the bench for Tav and Wing. Batth was filling in for Ayala and Fry covered the RB slot with McNair on the Bench. TP received a warm welcome from the home fans as expected as the two sides assembled for the minutes silence just before Kick Off on a very windy (is it ever not windy at the Bet365?) evening.

The game started at a “testing” tempo with both sides resolute, keeping their powder dry in the opening ten minutes with nothing of any major note happening. Maybe it was the timing of the match or it simply being selected for TV but the ground seemed sparsely populated despite the claimed 24,500 crowd and if it wasn’t for the wind cutting in from the exposed corners there wouldn’t have been any atmosphere at all. On fifteen minutes Afobe had a chance but was superbly marshalled by Batth and his effort didn’t trouble Randolph. At the other end Hugill was battling alone and making things difficult for Shawcross which the duel saw plenty of pushing and shoving but more of which I’ll come to later.

Stoke had most of the possession and were pushing Boro but we didn’t look seriously troubled. The back line of Friend, Flint, Batth and Fry dealt with everything hurled into the box from a few Stoke free kicks and corners. Being honest at this stage it was so predictable I think I could have written the match report last week as both sides didn’t look like scoring and as a contest it must have been pretty dry to watch for any neutrals. The Hugill/Shawcross battle saw Hugill get the better of him on a break only to be fouled which meant Shawcross entered the Ref’s book. Up until this point challenges on Hugill seemed to be fair in the eyes of the officials despite one high attempt, yet if a Boro player so much as breathed on Afobe or Berahino the Ref Rob Jones immediately blew. My bias is obvious but I did get a feeling that tonight’s Ref wasn’t as even-handed as he perhaps could and should have been when it came to Strikers being manhandled. Perhaps Hugill’s recent history had caught up with him like the boy who cried Wolf.

Four minutes after booking Shawcross, Rob Jones then blew for a foul in Boro’s favour after a scrappy battle which continued in the heat of the moment with Clayts sliding in on Etebo. Despite play already stopped for the earlier infringement, Jones decided to book Clayts for his lunging challenge for which the ante had been upped in the earlier scrap for the free kick. Arguably Clayts should have kept a cooler head but the Ref should have been stronger and quicker in my mind in blowing for the original foul. So the yellow card count was now 1-1 and things were back level again. That spark however fired a bit of life into Boro with Braithwaite hitting a dipping shot over Butland but it was directly at him and was easily collected out of the air. Downing then cut inside and fired a shot from outside the box which again required Butland to be alert in dealing with it.

Shawcross was then guilty of a “svelte” block on Howson as he ran into the Stoke box but the Ref bottled the decision as it was either a foul and a sending off for Shawcross for a second yellow or a booking for Howson for simulation. Had it been at the other end, I think we would have seen a second yellow and it occurred to me that Ayala wasn’t playing tonight and maybe that was a disguised blessing of sorts. For the silly yellow card, Clayts then made amends of sorts with the most entertaining bit of skill on the night, he dummied a ball cleared out of the Stoke defence, made a faux attempt to play the ball, let it drop, shielded it, spun around leaving his opponent dizzy and chasing his shadow putting Boro back on the attack.

Two minutes after Boro’s purple patch, Berahino was put through, fired a shot that fortunately was anticipated with a wonderful reflex reaction again from Batth in blocking the attempt to keep Randolph safe. Next up was Dael Fry to head away an Edwards cross destined to find Afobe as the half was closing in on the forty-five minute mark. One minute of added time drained away as the sides went in for the break with both Managers probably comfortable with their defences.

There was a lot of passing and grafting in the first half but little real quality on show. Besic had a few moments but nothing spectacular except for an over-hit ball, which rankled the away fans huddled in the opposite corner. Braithwaite also saw plenty of the ball but never really looked like he knew what he was going to do next with it.

The sides recommenced the second half with the same individuals as had finished the first half. A moment of genius or madness depending upon your half-full or half-empty perspective came from Mo when he played a 30 yard ball back to Randolph who unable to handle it had the presence of mind to head it clear for a throw in. Moments later Batth again saved the day to the point where TP will be hard pushed to find a reason to drop him after Ayala has sat this one out serving his one game suspension.

The game went into a slightly more entertaining phase as both sides attacked and left some openings at the other end but in truth it was looking very unlikely that either would score any time soon. Afobe was irked at the linesman on the far side as he flagged him offside when he felt he had sprung the trap. That was as about as riveting as the game had become as it entered the last thirty minutes. TP clearly thought the same and hooked the disappointing Dane for Tavernier.

A cutting incisive ball through to Hugill saw him charge past Shawcross, who couldn’t foul him for fear of a sending off, for a one-on-one with Butland. Jordan went for the keepers near post and the tightest angle to which the spreading Butland was equal to it and with it went the best chance of the night.

Tav was covering the left side but his pace was now a different challenge for Stoke to deal with. Five minutes after Tav had come on it was Lewis Wing’s turn to take to the Championship stage after almost a two month absence. Surprisingly it was Downing who came off with Howson going wide right and Wing playing just behind Hugill. A hustle in the Stoke box saw Wing scrapping and although he lost his tussle the ball broke from the hassled Stoke defender to Howson who was Jonny on the spot (well edge on the six yard box anyway) but Butland made his second close range save this time courtesy of his outstretched legs. Those two opportunities could have won it for Boro and were the best chances of the night but it wasn’t to be.

The most interesting aspect of the game for me came when we were repelling Stokes late desperation to clinch a winner. A cleared ball out found Hugill who held the ball up then laid it off for Wing who played a ball out to Tav to run onto, which was the move of the night in terms of no slow predictable passing, just a series of quick intuitive gut instincts which would have been perfect for those of us to yell from the rooftops to TP “see we told you” but excitement got the better of Tav and he lashed his shot high, wide and handsome. Whilst it didn’t come off, allied to the Palace game, there does seem to be an understanding, awareness and appreciation between the trinity.

That breakaway may have factored into Rowett’s thinking so much so that he made a triple last ditch substitution with boo-boy McLean, Crouch and Bojan coming on for the last ten minutes. Almost immediately Stoke hoofed balls towards Crouch but Batth, Randolph and Flint were unfazed and cleared everything thrown at them. A bloody and battered George was planned to make an exit after being on the receiving end of a forearm smash with Saville and then McNair stripped to replace him but our Captain wasn’t giving up any time soon and indicated his determination to carry on right until the end.

The final few minutes saw a Corner for Boro from which we failed to capitalise on with a poorly hit lofted ball easily dealt with by Butland. It ended 0-0, which wasn’t exactly the surprise result of the weekend and kept Boro in third spot at least until Leeds play on Sunday. MOM was between Friend, Clayts and Batth for me but it has to be Batth who was making his first Boro Championship appearance. He was cool as a cucumber all evening and can rightly consider himself harshly treated if Ayala reclaims his place on the basis of this evening’s performance.

If only we can sort out the sharp end of this side but how many times have we said that. I do feel however that there is something between Hugill, Wing and Tavernier if given the chance and persevered with. Fast, crisp and different qualities between the three of them, Hugill may not be the 25 goal a season Striker we want but his bustling disruptive style seems a good foil for the other two.

 

Middlesbrough		Crystal Palace
Wing	45’+3
Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	43% 9 1 1 8	Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	57% 8 3 9 13

Wing Wizard’s Magic stakes a claim

Tonight brought a reunion for TP with one of his former clubs whose parting of the ways wasn’t particularly amicable. By now the acrimony I’m sure has long since faded away almost like home goals at the Riverside, a distant memory.

Both clubs at present have an aversion to scoring goals it would seem. Only 5 clubs have scored fewer goals than Boro in the Championship and 4 of them are in the bottom 6 the other being QPR. Palace have not won since they beat WBA in the last round of the Caribou Cup losing three and drawing against Arsenal 2-2 at the Weekend but with both their goals coming from the Penalty spot which may be a deciding factor again tonight should it end equal on the night.

The last time these two sides met in the League Cup was in 2011 at Selhurst Park when Palace won 2-1 but there have been many changes with both clubs since then so no store can be put on that night. Likewise the last time we met which was in the Premiership the season before last and we had a “Friendless” AK tactical meltdown that day when Patrick van Aanholt scored the day’s solitary goal to lift the Eagles out of the relegation zone.

Onto tonight’s fixture and significant changes were expected by both managers pre kick off and the Boro side was a bit of a hybrid with seven changes containing the likes of Leadbitter, Batth and of course Wing and Tavernier but also saw the inclusion of Ayala, Braithwaite and Hugill. Ayala is facing a suspension for the trip to Stoke so it probably made sense giving him a run out. Allegedly a spell had been cast which had spread through the bowels of Rockliffe and prevented TP utilising some players who may otherwise have got a game or a place on the bench at least. Roy Hodgson meanwhile went one better and made eight changes to his Eagles side which included the likes of Townsend, Ayew, Souare, Schlupp and ex-Boro target Puncheon.

A solemn minutes silence was impeccably held in remembrance of the weekend’s Leicester City tragedy heralded by the whistle of tonight’s Ref Paul Tierney.

Dark mist encircling from the Tees shrouded the chilly Riverside on Hallows eve as Boro kicked off with a 433 line up at the unusual hour of 8.00pm. We started on the front foot with George Fiend charging up towards the Palace goal and we actually recorded a shot at the end of a Boo-tiful move. McNair then fizzed a ball into Braithwaite at the far post, chested it down but his touch was just too much to finish off the move. Lewis Wing was keen not to be outdone as he then signalled his intent in setting up another Boro attack. Tavernier then broke and played it into Braithwaite who fired a shot across the face of the Palace goal causing consternation for Keeper Guaita dressed all in slime green.

A Townsend corner was headed clear, Braithwaite cleverly held the ball up on the half way line allowing his team-mates a chance to break out and he picking out Wing on the right flank with a spellbound cross field ball. Lewis fired a shot in at Guaita from outside the box which was spilled out to George Fiend, who took on two defenders but the move eventually went out for a goal kick. Three minutes later George broke into the box again this time taking on four defenders but fell literally at the last hurdle courtesy of a Palace body check.

The opening quarter of an hour saw some of the best Boro football that the Riverside had graced all season. The pace dipped a little as Palace tried a little bit of possession football in and around their own half.

A blood-curdling challenge involving McQueen and Schlupp saw the Boro player howl in agony as his leg seemingly got stuck and his knee gave way. It didn’t look good as he was stretchered off with Saville replacing him. With Shotton seemingly out for a while it now looks like McQueen could be out for some time leaving Boro well short of two wing backs. The game restarted with Boro giving the ball away allowing Schlupp to get a half shot away which was easily smothered by Dimi.

A period of patient Boro possession saw the ball lose out to Palace but with Boro regaining possession immediately, McNair lobbed a high ball up to Hugill who shielded the ball from several yellow shirts with Wing nipping in to collect and play a through ball to Tav who ran into the Palace box but his shot was unfortunately blocked. A minute later a long ball hoofed up field by the Eagles was headed down to Schlupp central on the edge of the 18 yard box but again Dimi was equal to the threat.

A brilliant cleared ball up from Dimi found Hugill who held the ball up again then laid it off to Saville who fed George flying down the left who then fired it into the Palace cauldron which just eluded Tav’s head but Hugill was waiting behind who volleyed just wide. With five minutes remaining Tav and Hugill harried and chased down the Palace defence with Hugill forcing Guaita into giving away a sloppy throw in from which Braithwaite received the cross but headed wide with what was at best a half chance.

Palace seemed very slow in their build up play and looked half-hearted compared to Boro. As they dwelled on the ball again Saville intercepted a poor pass releasing Hugill, charging through on the right but as he closed down on goal his shot went well wayward. Another Boro break quickly followed this time with Tav bursting forward leaving three players for dead and a cheeky toe poke pass out to Hugill saw the Marsked magician fire a shot across Guaita’s goal. Just as the game entered time added on for McQueen’s injury a desperate double tackle by Batth and Ayala came off I think Townsend’s shin for a Boro Goal kick.

Dimi hit the ball downfield which was battled for by Hugill and Braithwaite who found Tav on the right side of midfield who played it into the path of the marauding Lewis Wing charging through like a banshee 25 yards out and unleashed an Adam Reach style thunderbolt leaving Guaita no chance to make it 1-0 to Boro in front of the Red Faction. The whistle went shortly after the restart and what a difference tonight’s performance was from the last few weeks. McNair looked confident and comfortable, Hugill scared the living daylights out of the Palace CB’s and Tav was full of spirit along with George Fiend terrorising on the left and Lewis Wing who just had to do the inevitable ending a fang-tastic first half!

The sides came out for the second half just as they went in as Palace started the second half proceedings. The first shot in anger was from Meyer who was set up by Ayew in the Boro box who played it back out from the penalty spot to the German but his shot was very Claytonesque fortunately. A low cross into the box was then cleared out by Batth as Boro looked resolute at the back. A free kick won by Hugill in the middle of the park was played out to McNair who floated in a troubling ball that bounced as if possessed creating a mischievous few seconds of panic for Guaita. A Palace corner was cleared by Boro and went aimlessly up to Guaita who panicked again along with Souare as Hugill and Tavernier closed them down winning another forfeited throw in 18 yards out.

That signalled the end of Jordan’s evening as Rudy Gestede was sent on to replace him on 55 minutes presumably to keep him fresh for Saturday after an impressive showing tonight. Palace were desperately pushing for the equaliser but Boro were defending in numbers and crucially having an outlet in Tavernier. A Championship-style tackle from Saville on 60 minutes set Wing up who rushed his shot but the Ref brought play back for a free kick in any case deeming the Northern Irish Internationals tackle too devilish for his liking.

The best chance for the Eagles so far in the game was cleared by Ayala and as Townsend returned the ball back into the Boro box once again Ayala cleared it for a Corner to the away side. Fletcher then came on for Braithwaite with an eye on Saturday presumably and Milivojevic on for Ayew. Almost immediately after the restart George Fiend scored after a hair-raising melee in the Palace box which Tierney somehow saw a free kick in the middle of it to rule it out.

A suspect corner was then awarded to Palace with McNair adjudged to have let the ball cross the byline by a hairs-breadth. Palace were now seriously upping their intensity in the search for an equaliser with twenty minutes to go. As much as Palace probed and passed Dimi hadn’t had an awful lot to do as we looked very organised defensively.

Tavernier ghosted the ball down his touchline straight out of defence to set up a series of bagatelle shots involving Wing, Gestede and in the end Saville who blasted over. McNair was then forearm smashed by Puncheon but fortunately Paddy got back on his feet as Palace were now becoming more physical. Palace were now playing trick or treat, knocking on Dimi’s goal. Meyer had a chance but badly scuffed his shot. Another swinging cross came in but this time was cleared for a corner by Fletcher arriving back into his own box just in time. A Tavernier cross well worked between himself and Lewis Wing saw Fletcher head a looping ball over the Palace crossbar onto the roof of the net in front of the North Stand.

Pape Souare then limped off as Sam Woods came on for the Left Back with 12 minutes of normal time remaining. Hodgson shuffled things with Woods going into a CB role and Palace were now throwing everything at Boro as they upped the pressure for a spell after the substitution. Ayala made one of his strong (or reckless) challenged from behind which had hearts in Boro mouths but then as if by magic George cleared, phew! A shot was then fired in from Meyer hit the side netting as Boro were now effectively camped in their own half hanging on to that solitary Lewis Wing goal.

Roy Hodgson threw his last sub on in an effort to try and prise open the Boro rear guard. Five minutes were left and Boro were now clinging on and Fletcher finding himself deployed as a defender. A frightening Townsend long-range shot was dealt with by Dimi diving across his goal to palm away to safety. A Boro break saw Tav fly down the left flank with Wing and Gestede screaming for it but he held onto it not fancying his chances of a clean cross and drew the inevitable foul taking the sting out of the game momentarily.

A great block saw a claim for a penalty from the yellow shirts for handball in a packed Boro box. Palace still kept passing the ball around relentlessly trying to unpick a Boro wall of Red Shirts determined not to give them the key to the gates and yet another ball spun in to go just wide of Dimi’s upright. Injury time and yet another uninvited wicked ball came in dealt with this time by George Fiend who was there to put it out for a corner which when it arrived was headed clear by Gestede and then relief, Tierney blew his whistle to put us into the quarter finals of the Cup as spellbound applause instead of boos broke out around the Riverside.

The game was one of two halves; the first half saw us get at the opposition with pace and tenacity. The second saw us sit tight and defend in numbers defiantly. Statistically we had nine shots to Palaces eight with only one of ours on target but it counted and showed the value of Lewis Wing in breaking deadlocks.

MOM is difficult as there were many in Red who merited it. Wing is the obvious one as he scored the winner but for me Tav was the threat, the one wizard that worried Palace when he got on the ball, and the one who provided an outlet. Ayala was great, George Fiend was immense and arguably equally deserves MOM, Batth was solid and dependable and McNair looked a different player to the one of late so fair play to him. Hugill was a real handful and caused problems and when he came on Fletcher showed a new side to his game in getting back defending as did Saville and Gestede in the closing stages to add height at the corners. Braithwaite looked class in the first half and Dimi rolled back the years near the end and I suspect wickedly enjoyed himself. The only negative was the injury to McQueen which looked like a long term one sadly.

As we all hoped for TP now has a massive selection headache for Stoke but perhaps the best news was saved until last when we were drawn at home to Burton in the next round of the Cup. I suspect that the Riverside may be less of a mausoleum that night and that there may be just a little more than 12,000 for that one!

 

Championship 2018-19: Week 14

Wed 31 Oct – 19:45: Boro v Crystal Palace (EFL Cup)
Sat 03 Nov – 17:30: Stoke v Boro

There was an extra spring in the steps of many arriving at the Riverside on Saturday as they anticipated that the nights would shortly be drawing in and they’d soon be able to look forward to leaving the ground in the comfort of gloom instead of evening sunshine. Although, before the clocks were once again turned back, some on Teesside were left wondering if the club had already inadvertently wound them all the way back to 2010 as the football being served up took on the rather uninspiring quality regularly served up by the Strachan era. With no Boro player now troubling the scorer in four Riverside outings, captain George Friend lead by example and showed his goal-shy team-mates just how to find the back of the net.

Although it seems there was no pleasing some moaners on the terraces as they insisted on making the minor quibble that it was at the wrong end. Friend argued after the game that Derby’s Waghorn would have put it away if he hadn’t have pounced instead – it was presumably too good a chance to turn down. Nevertheless, an over-polite Derby eventually returned the favour as their 18-year old right-back Jayden Bogle clinically slotted the ball into the net to ‘earn’ Boro a vital if undeserved point to leave the Teesside crowd once more extolling the benefits of youth – with no doubt Tony Pulis giving knowing looks in the direction of the opposition bench as he felt vindicated for sticking with men.

Frank Lampard may have shown his inexperience by selecting way too many young players that naively played without fear. Surely it’s far better to have men on the pitch who are hardened enough to understand football is a game best played without the exuberance of wanting to see joy in the eyes of those who pay to watch. Indeed, Boro saw out the game to the backing track of their manager barking “don’t foul” on loop from the dugout – thus instructing his players to resist the urge of giving away a needless free-kick on the edge of the box, which he believed they so desperately wanted to do.

Sadly the home support had to witness yet another poor display from the men in red and many have become increasingly vocal in their criticism of their manager’s tactics. In term of team selection, Tony Pulis appears to have painted himself into a corner and then taken pleasure at watching it dry as his choices put in insipid displays. The Boro manager has also recently glossed over his team’s failure to score at the Riverside by instead meticulously counting crosses as proof of their creativity. Although for the Boro faithful getting curled up in their matchday seats, counting crosses has become an alternative for counting sheep for those struggling to keep their heavier and heavier eyelids open as they drift off to the ovine entertainment on the pitch.

Tony Pulis may have become the master of the blank verse as he can see no rhyme or reason why his side are not the free-scoring outfit that they’re supposed to be. OK, the players may not exactly be looking like poetry in motion at the moment, but it turns out our artists on the pitch are up with the best with an average of 25 crosses per game. A Statistical straw to clutch at perhaps, since it fails to inform us whether they either refrain from avoiding the first defender’s thigh or carelessly escape the attentions of a Boro forward wandering lonely as a cloud into the box. Although to continue the verse of Wordsworth, any shots on goal tend to be ones “That float on high o’er vales and hills” as the Boro players later explain the adrenaline kicked in “When all at once I saw a crowd”.

The blame, according to Pulis, lies seemingly with our broad-brush strikers, who even the best police artists would struggle to produce an identikit image that few would ultimately recognise as the culprit charged with putting the ball in the back of the net. Indeed, some strikers at the club look like they were painted by Pablo Picasso himself given the random nature at which the ball bounces of their cubist heads. While ‘Rudy Gestede and his dodecahedron head’ may become a terrace chant for the geometry wing of the Red Faction, many Boro followers will be hoping the golden ration of chances to those being converted by the Vitruvian Man that is Britt Assombalonga will somehow improve and lead to a renaissance in his form. Though it’s doubtful if even the genius of da Vinci would be able to square the circle of discovering a Boro striker who will regularly find the net.

Indeed, the sketchy performances of the £15m man have often given the appearance of him having twice as many legs as he can reasonably be expected to cope with, while frequently cutting a forlorn figure as he simultaneously holds his arms out in both exasperation and apology. There are few signs that Assombalonga will return any time soon to getting those divine proportion of goals under Tony Pulis, which he had once enjoyed at Forest. It may seem simplistic, but playing to somebody’s weaknesses is probably not the optimal way to get the best out of them – though perhaps his strengths were over-stated in a bid to justify the price-tag. However, no matter which way you try to orientate the once-hailed missing piece of the promotion jigsaw, it’s clear to many observers that he doesn’t fit into the picture of what a Tony Pulis striker is expected to be – the problem for the Boro manager is that none of the other options appear to either.

Since his arrival on a season loan from the Hammers, Jordan Hugill has quickly established himself as third choice under Pulis after proving to be little more than a blunt instrument. While the Middlesbrough-born strike could have expected to be taken to the hearts of his home-town crowd, it’s likely we’ll perhaps soon be hearing the modified famous chant: “he’s one of our own, we got him on loan, thank god he’s one we don’t own” as it looks like a bullet dodged in an increasing list of misfiring strikers who’ve arrived on expensive contracts – including fellow Hammer Ashley Fletcher, who has become a rather pricey option for the development squad since his £7m move. Although, it hasn’t been limited to just strikers, with the loan of midfielder George Saville also soon to be converted in a permanent £7m deal. He’s just the latest in a series of offers made by the club that were just “too good to refuse” and have now started to look like they were possibly done in haste.

It is perhaps one of the biggest criticisms of the club that they have thrown a lot of money at players, especially strikers, most of whom haven’t convinced that it was remotely well spent. There would be little change from £50m on the eye-watering balance sheets when totting up the current fees paid for Assombalonga, Braithwaite, Gestede, Fletcher and Hugill. If having a first touch that is often your last was rated so highly then it could perhaps explain some of those inflated prices Boro paid. It should at least question the validity of believing that the market never lies – though perhaps it merely exposes the truth of buyers not really knowing what the value of something is. In fact, some may be beginning to wonder if the recruitment department would have been better off sticking five pins into a random list of League One strikers – it would have possibly provided the club with a more potent group of players, for probably a fraction of the cost and wages. Not that I would advocate that Neil Bausor rushes out to buy some pins before the January window opens – unless of course some of the donkeys planned for a clear-out are still missing their tails.

It’s possible we’re being too critical of Tony Pulis and he’s simply paying the price of raised expectations following a freak set of results in August that saw the makeshift team exceed their potential. In their Riverside bow, Boro were quick out of the blocks against current leaders Sheffield United and blew them away inside 25 minutes, thanks to two well-delivered Lewis Wing corners that were converted – although for the purposes of balance, others from him were reported as not being so well executed. In the next home game, against a then struggling Birmingham side, Tony Pulis’s team were less impressive with a 1-0 victory that saw only 2 shots on target – in fact despite the Blues being reduced to ten men for the last ten minutes, Boro were hanging on to the three points and were glad to hear the final whistle.

After Tony Pulis’s side continued their winning run with a textbook away victory at Bristol City, where although the Robins had enjoyed twice as much possession, Boro defended well and were two-up after half-an-hour thanks to a Braithwaite spot-kick and a Assombalonga headed goal – the game was then ‘managed’ and despite a few scares held their early lead. The following home game against West Brom saw that last-gasp hand-controlled winner by Ayala – with Boro having only 38 per cent possession and squandering a number of chances in similar fashion to what we’ve seen more recently.

Sometimes the result papers over the cracks and both of those single-goal home victories could easily have been the usual blanks. If we add to that Boro were woeful for 70 minutes in their opener at Millwall, it may in fact be a little rose-tinted to start thinking Boro’s form has appreciably dipped since August. In truth, the main difference is perhaps Boro lost their intensity and began to start games more slowly. The arrival of new players didn’t add much to the party as only Besic has consistently broke into the starting eleven – though it could be argued he’s not exactly a ‘new’ player given he was here last season. The main complaint is that the promising performances by academy graduates in August have not been built on – even Dael Fry saw his starts limited as Tony Pulis reverted to a conventional back four to accommodate Martin Braithwaite.

The uninspiring shades of magnolia that are the summer recruits of Saville, McQueen, McNair, Batth, and Hugill have all been left to blend together inoffensively on the bench, which has left no room for the up-and-coming Wing, Tavernier or Chapman to further impress. It’s well documented that most of those signings were probably not the manager’s first choices and the fact is that they have in the space of a few weeks become little more than bed-blockers to exciting young talent developed at the club. Whilst it’s perfectly reasonable to bring in squad players who can cover for injury and suspensions, having low-impact squad players on your bench essential means the manager has little hope of giving the opposition anything to worry about or indeed lift an increasingly deflated crowd.

Many will be hoping the January window will see better quality players arrive and some much needed pace, guile and clinical finishing – though all of those previously mentioned bench-warmers are either permanent or season-long loans. Will that mean moving on players who are currently getting picked for the first team instead? Pulis doesn’t like a big squad, he’s overlooked Wing, Tavernier and others but hasn’t seemingly placed much faith in most of the summer recruits. Maybe he feels his core group is good enough but with a dysfunctional sharp end and essentially make-shift wing-backs it’s not quite the team in his image he would want.

Like many in the game, Tony Pulis is perhaps finding that building a solid team from the back is the less difficult part. We discovered under previous Boro managers that simply trying to bolt on better attacking players is not as easy as it may sound. The way the team functions as a unit often determines how it operates in both defence and attack – if you lean too much in one direction it will ultimately adversely effect the other. At present, the balance doesn’t seem to be right and it may well be it’s not at the points where the team visibly appears to fail as to where the problems may lie.

For all the neat play and decent performances from players such as Downing, Howson, Besic or Clayton – none of them have got much in the way of goals or assists. The same goes for Friend and Shotton – are they effective as wing-backs if they don’t provide assists? It may even be that their manager has them on a tight leash that prevents them from becoming less predictable to the opposition. Derby’s youngsters gave us a lesson on free-flowing attacking football – though it apparently comes at the expense of being less solid at the back. The question for Boro is whether it’s time to take more risks in a bid to be more potent – though I feel we’ve been here before and that was why Steve Gibson brought in Garry Monk and let him have free reign of his cheque book. I suspect we will be sticking to the world according to Tony Pulis for now and probably the foreseeable future.

This week sees games against two of Tony Pulis’s former clubs, with Crystal Palace first up in the Caraboa Cup on Wednesday. The Boro manager would probably ‘love it’ if his side knocked the Eagles out of the competition but he’s unlikely to go all Kevin Keegan on us at the pre-match press conference since it’s still likely to be reserve-style fixture between teams resting their key players for the league games at the weekend. Post-Pulis, Palace are still struggling to score goals in the Premier League and if those on Teesside were feeling underwhelmed at not seeing the net bulge at the Riverside, then spare a thought for our visitors, who only witnessed their first goal at home this season after they converted a penalty against Arsenal at the weekend. They’ve managed just 7 goals all season despite having the talents of Wilfried Zaha and Andros Townsend at their disposal – though a certain Jason Puncheon came on as sub and he may well get a start at the Riverside to receive the warm welcome he declined in the loan window.

It’s widely expected that we’ll see the usual ten or eleven changes, with all those on the fringes of the First XI getting the benefit of a start. They will be perhaps joined by club captain Grant Leadbitter, Ashley Fletcher, plus some of the academy boys such as Lewis Wing and Marcus Tavernier. A place in the quarter-finals is up for grabs for the winners, so we may see stronger benches than usual – many Boro followers will be looking to see if any youngsters impress enough to be seen again in a Boro shirt this season.

The trip to Stoke on Saturday has been chosen as the early-evening televised game and it’s hard to see why other than the Pulis factor –  though not to be confused with the X-Factor later in the evening where struggling performers regurgitate their usual hard-luck stories in a bid for public sympathy. Stoke have been defensively quite tight in recent weeks and have only conceded twice in their last four games, which included the three in-form sides of Sheffield United, Norwich and Birmingham. After an indifferent start to the season that saw the Potters win just once in their opening seven fixtures, Gary Rowett’s side have slowly moved up the table and are now just five points outside the play-offs.

Tony Pulis will most likely get a good reception from the home crowd, which will make a nice change given the boos he’s been getting used to lately. It’s a game he will not want to lose and if both sides keep it tight then it’s got all the makings of another TV classic nil-nil encounter of the strictly not watching variety. With Leeds not playing until Sunday and Sheffield United away at Forest, then I am as ever contractually obliged to say Boro can go top if they win!

Middlesbrough		Derby County
Bogle	84′ (og)	Friend	19′ (og)
Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	41% 10 0 9 12	Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	59% 18 7 4 10

Randolph rescues outclassed Boro

This match pitched joint top Boro with the media darlings “Frank Lampard’s Derby”. Boro have been spluttering lately and look anything but a coherent Promotion chasing side yet somehow they have clung to an automatic promotion spot mainly due to the ineptness of the others rather than their own form and belief. Belief was the key word for today’s clash and Derby had it by the bucketful after resounding successes over the Baggies and the Blades and came to the Riverside looking to make it a treble of “B” scalps in a little over a week.

Boro had won nine out of their previous eleven home games against the Rams but last year’s 3-0 loss is still fresh in Boro supporter’s memory. This time around Derby seem to be in fine free flowing goal scoring form while Boro in contrast couldn’t score if their lives depended on it at the Riverside. The painful display against Rotherham on Tuesday night just topped a series of confused insipid displays with the Manager’s tactics being called into question for the first time since his arrival. TP was yet again uttering how his side need to be more clinical in the final third, well with nigh on £40M worth of striking “talent” at his disposal the fans were a little more direct on Tuesday night signing off with a chorus of boos. TP’s tenure is now at a questionable hurdle for the first time since taking over the reins from Garry Monk and Derby are either the worst side to face under such circumstances or the best depending upon your outlook.

Shotton would definitely be missing for Boro as would Bryson for the Rams along with George Evans and Joe Ledley. Boro fans were mostly interested in how many CB’s would be playing and how many benched as oppose to the final selected eleven. TP restored Dael Fry at the expense of Braithwaite who swapped seats on the bench with the youngster which was just as well as Fry made two crucial clearance headers in the opening five minutes to prevent Derby taking an early lead. Maybe it was the weather but Boro started in slow motion, almost frozen as they chased the shadows of the Derby youngsters. McNair had continued as he had for Northern Ireland recently and against Rotherham on Tuesday night looking completely ill at ease in the RB role. He stood off his man, giving them time and space repeatedly and it was only going to be a matter of time before the totally dominant Rams punished us down that flank.

Another foray down our weak right flank saw another cross fired into Marriott who fortunately headed wide just after those two Fry headers and with less than ten minutes gone we could and perhaps should have been three nil down as we were clinging on rather than defending doggedly. Derby are notoriously quick and precise on the offensive but equally notorious for being edgy, nervous, desperate and porous at the back. Considering that this is both well known and often debated it was a surprise to see TP’s tactics completely implode in the opening spell. We were so far off the pace that had it not been for Randolph we could have been four of five goals behind in the opening quarter hour.

Boro’s opening spell was as tactically impoverished as I can remember for a very long time. It seemed as though no pre-planning or scouting had taken place and Derby’s game plan was a complete surprise to the Boro dug out. After Tuesday night the home fans were starting to boo and jeer, negative, jittery back passes borne out of the hopelessness of the way the side had been set up and the glaring repeated weakness of shoehorning McNair into a role that he has shown he isn’t comfortable with. Everything about Boro was wrong, the nervous Derby defence were under no pressure from the isolated slow and lumbering Assombalonga. Apart from Randolph, Boro were very poor in every department.

The positive was that at least we were being entertained by the Derby kids who simply tortured us over every blade of grass by quick, incisive, slick passing movements. It was like watching a squash ball ping around the Easter Island giant statues. After Wilson had an effort palmed over by Randolph and a free kick that went just over the inevitable and long overdue the opening goal came on 19 minutes after McNair made a hash of escorting the ball out harmlessly and pinged the ball back to Downing who couldn’t control it and the cross came in from Malone evading all three CB’s to find Waghorn who with the help of Friend’s close attentions somehow managed to get the ball over the line.

At this point had the contest been in a boxing ring the towel would have been thrown in to save the pugilist from a pulverising. Undeservedly and against the run of play a misjudged back pass at the Derby defence allowed Besic throw who slipped the ball across to Britt who seemed to be wearing clown shoes instead of football boots as he delayed deploying a shot past Carson. The chance was gone and with it any hope we may have had to avoid a total humiliation. The only other effort of merit was a Downing ball played into Flint who seemed to get under the ball which is now his default heading position and Carson was never worried.

Derby had enjoyed something like 80% of the possession at this stage and the only surprise in that stats was that Boro then by default must have had 20 per cent possession at some point unless that included the absent ball boys taking an eternity to retrieve the ball apart from the lad in the NW corner who showed more reflexes than TP’s “Men”. The brief moments when we had the ball we looked shocked and frightened made worse by Besic trying the most ridiculous back heel just outside his own box gifting Derby another opportunity as if they needed it. It will be interesting to see if the same rule of being dropped applies to the big money stars as it does to the Boro lads?

Belatedly TP realised that if he didn’t change something and quickly then the afternoon could turn out to be his Waterloo. Home Boos had resurfaced as the fans saw a disjointed team lacking any belief or the wherewithal to clear their heads. Fry was shuffled out to RB and McNair pushed further forward to form the right side of the midfield as we switched to a back four. Derby weren’t finished as they hit the post after more heroics from Randolph saved our blushes. Almost immediately we looked better balanced, more stable and McNair looked more comfortable removed from the firing line of playing RB.

In an effort to make up for his aberration moments earlier Besic was now trying to drive his team-mates forward but his dazzling dribbles tended to be in isolation and on his own unique wavelength. In the dying moments of the half a scrambled clearance from a Boro corner almost netted an equaliser just before the break.

The half time was going to be an interesting one because the reality is that whatever game plan and tactics that had been scouted and worked on needed ripping up and set on fire to ensure they could never be accidentally uncovered and redeployed in the future. The policy of picking the big signings and loanees rather than abilities and variety meant that TP had little in his locker to change things other than the same old same old.

The second half restarted with no changes from either manager which wasn’t surprising from a Derby perspective but borderline hilarious from a Boro one given the total failure of the first half at every level. Boro looked a little less distressed and exposed with Fry behind McNair but our “style” of football was to hump it high which meant that things inevitably came straight back at us as Britt could neither jump nor control or hold onto the ball. Indeed it was a comical attempt to control a wide ball near the corner flag where his left leg seemingly tackled his right leg to conspire to turn a rare attack into a goal kick. This was rightly just about the last contribution from Britt as he was hooked at the next opportunity for Rudy Gestede along with Besic for Saville. The Besic switch was a bizarre one, a player who could be unpredictable but maybe unlock the Derby defence for a steady defensive Championship midfielder who quickly attracted the attention of the fans for passing backwards, not spotting opening and generally slowing things down, losing possession and putting us under pressure.

Just a few minutes previous to all this in fact after only five minutes of the half, the hapless Paddy McNair had been replaced by Braithwaite. Downing was now switched to the right in front of Fry with Braithwaite operating on the left and big Rudy up front. Derby looked to be entering a control and containment mode while Boro just looked desperate and lacking any game plan other than hoof clearances up field. Hoof passes up field in the hope that Rudy wins something and at least in bypassed the Derby youngsters in the middle of the park who put simply had been impossible to live with from a Boro perspective.

George Friend had a one two moment and found himself in nosebleed territory and unfortunately as is usually the case with George the chance came to nothing. With 25 minutes left Nugent came on for the Rams to a warm generous applause from the Home support as Boro were looking a little more composed but still had yet to register a single shot at Carson. What wouldn’t we have given for a Nugent type Striker to come on in place of those we find ourselves at the club!

It didn’t take long for Nugent to register a shot or for Wilson to test the effervescent Randolph again with a free kick for a foul on the ex Boro Striker. In stark contrast Friend fired a low ball across the box for Gestede to have a carbon copy of Britt’s miss against Rotherham in the same spot in the same goalmouth. A minute later a pin perfect cross to Gestede’s head saw him glance his header wide of an open goal. An earlier challenge with Waghorn had left Rudy limping for the rest of the game which may have hindered his agility.

The contest should have been wrapped up again by Nugent who fortunately must have been wearing his Typical Boro boots as Randolph somehow managed to smother the danger yet again. Another hoofed ball saw Ayala flick on his header to Flint who once again failed to get any accuracy on his header. As the clock was running down and most of us had resigned ourselves to another defeat along with yet another Riverside game without a Boro goal another high ball came in which was headed on to loop into the Derby box beyond the hampered Gestede and Bogle could have left it but somehow got a shin or at least some part of his lower leg to send it past the sprawling Carson to level it at 1-1. Embarrassed smiles and laughter momentarily broke out in the North Stand before the celebrations. The remaining few minutes including injury time saw the game more open than it had been all afternoon with Boro even having the temerity to nick another while Derby cleared their heads. It finished with the Boro somehow avoiding a hammering and fluking a draw in the end.

Any relief from today’s draw must be short-lived. A pattern is developing and Boro despite the best efforts of others not to leave them behind are slipping. We are 17th in the form table for the last 6 home games, for the last 4 home games the reading is even worse seeing us in 22nd spot.

There was an obvious MOM, Darren Randolph was incredible and single-handedly saved TP and half a dozen of his team mates from a deserved savage outpouring on the final whistle. Excuses about missed chances and so many crosses wear very thin when it is blindingly obvious what the problem is or at least in part. Recruitment have brought in players that are no better than what was already at the club and indeed poorer in many instances. The fact that they are getting a place in the starting line-up and on the bench does nobody any favours. Where we are in the table has much to be admired but where we could be had our buying/loaning and selling and selection been more astute could be a legacy that we rue for decades to come if not admitted and addressed.

Today the youth of Derby tore us apart and humiliated static, staid footballers who could not live with them let alone cope. We have endured four games now without a Riverside Boro goal apart from Bogle getting TP out of a hole of his own making today. Three points from a possible twelve; this isn’t survival form let alone promotion.

Middlesbrough		Rotherham
Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	65% 20 5 13 6	Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	35% 8 2 7 11

Blank Boro ground down

The Millers travelled up to Teesside more through hope than expectation today. Rotherham had amassed the grand total of null points from their travels this season to date so whatever their selection was going to be it was considered unlikely to trouble Boro who were dauntingly at the opposite end of the table. Their Manager Paul Warne pre game had described tonight’s match as a “free hit” in a nothing to lose mind-set presumably intended to reduce fears and remove any unrealistic expectations. Boro fans of course had the “Typical Boro” fear for a game that should be a nailed on three points but could typically end up a banana skin.

The most recent connections between the two sides was Dael Fry having spent some time on loan down there as had Grant apparently earlier on in his career and Ledesma who now plies his trade in real New York Stadiums across the pond. The Boro team news was eagerly awaited as we wondered whether TP would rest a few, stick with five or switch to four at the back and who would be making way for Braithwaite? As it turned out TP switched to a back four again, meaning Dael Fry missed out again. The same ineffective set up that was disastrous against Forest then reversed against Sheffield Wednesday after an admission of getting things wrong previously had been reintroduced.

The absence of Shotton saw McNair at RB and Braithwaite introduced at the expense of a CB. The opening moments of the game saw a few forays from the Millers especially down McNair’s side which may have been coincidence or a deliberate ploy to exploit the reshuffle at the back. Paddy looked uncomfortable and far from assured and struggled to make any impact in an attacking sense. Ayala and Flint were solid but there was nothing else in terms of building from the back without Fry being there. George and Stewy were Boro’s main attacking threat or in reality only attacking threat in a very poor and disjointed first half.

We didn’t sign Bolasie or Adomah, we sold Adama and Tav doesn’t even get a sniff of the bench so unless we play with three centre-backs and two wing-backs we have no width, outlets or creativity. Tonight was as predictable as it was horrendous to watch once the team had been announced. I’m not sure what position is McNair’s best but it certainly isn’t as a Right Back let alone a Wing Back even allowing for one good run into the box in the second half. I was at times thinking George was the third CB and we were playing with three at the back after all but George spent most of his time linking up with Stewy on runs down the touchline so that couldn’t have been the case or maybe it was and he just forgot himself. Whatever was supposed to be happening clearly wasn’t as the entire team just looked a totally dysfunctional unit.

Besic who had excelled against Wednesday held onto the ball too long on numerous occasions and missed the killer pass and besides the movement was slow and ponderous at best. Britt was scrapping and Braithwaite provided a few moments including a great spurned chance which was easily saved by Rodak just after Randolph had pulled off a double reflex save seconds earlier at the other end to spare Tony’s blushes. Considering this was top versus bottom there was no indication to the neutral observer who was who, indeed a flurry of successive first half corners from the Millers had us hanging on desperately failing to clear our lines.

We were so poor in the first half that the only consolation was that Rotherham hadn’t earned any points on their travels this season so surely we couldn’t let this one slip? We sent corners and free kicks in from Stewy but they were either too close to Rodak in the Rotherham goal or Flint was underneath them and in the wrong part of the goalmouth to make them count. There was nothing else of note in the first half such was the paucity of the non-event, heaven help anyone who tuned in on the Red Button looking for entertainment. In truth Rotherham looked calm and unruffled controlling large parts of the game with relative ease from a very poor Boro side that lacked any belief or conviction.

The second half didn’t see any personnel changes which was a surprise considering the abysmal first half torture but then again not really as there was nothing on the bench that could really alter what was happening out on the pitch. No pace, no craft and no tempo or speed, just a defensive midfielder, two non-scoring Strikers, two centre-backs and a left-back. The second half started with a Boro attack which we hoped was a sign of things to come but like our hopes for the evening were dashed when Braithwaite was clattered and went down with a head injury. The sight of Hugill warming up had us hoping that the Dane would stagger to his feet but as one wag to my left extolled that even if Braithwaite was left prostrate on the grass and we played on it would be just like playing with Hugill anyway.

As if a warning was needed the first real ooh aah moment was when Manning fired a shot which had Randolph scrambling to see the effort just past his post. Boro did respond by entering a little purple patch which wasn’t exactly convincing but it was the best we were going to get and a low Downing cross into the feet of Assombalonga had poor Britt trying to remember the steps to the hokey cokey but he got them all wrong. As Rodak spilled the ball at his feet six inches from the goal line, Britt was putting his left foot out his right foot out, out, out, out and shake them all about as the ball was cleared. Once again Britt’s requirement to have five or six stonewall chances to convert just one bit us on the backside. That said it would have been rough justice on the Millers who were well deserving of their point and indeed as an away team perhaps felt unlucky not to have nicked all three.

A volley from Downing as the ball was cleared out to him inside the box was hit with his left foot which signalled it was going to miss the target as soon as it left his left boot when his right one would have sent it goalwards. That was the signal for TP to make big changes to radically alter the game and to take control except he took off the struggling McNair (who had actually looked a little better in the second half) and Braithwaite who was dribbling and twisting but most of it was going sideways for the creative pairing of McQueen and Gestede. Downing was now on the right side with McQueen on the left and we then just humped long and high balls up to big Rudy. It was a joy to watch a Managerial masterstroke against such limited opposition. What had been pure dross and dire all night had now just become desperate.

In fairness to Gestede he put himself about and tried to add something but the reality is there were no tactics, shape or strategy and Boro were a busted flush by this point. If anything Rotherham looked the more likely to score with Manning once again testing Randolph from range and Smith then coming closest as TP’s changes had bombed. If it hadn’t been so predictable it may actually have been disappointing but by now we had resigned ourselves to another game with pure sterility in front of (or indeed anywhere near) the opposition goal. With just under ten minutes remaining TP took off Britt and put on Hugill who battled and scrapped and did actually stay on his feet much to our relief. Nothing changed of course as the die had been well cast even before a ball was kicked with TP’s selections and tactics. And so the game petered out to a well deserved draw enabling the visitors to pick up their first point on the road all season as Boro left the pitch to a chorus of boos and jeers.

As regards the Man of the Match award it was probably Lewis Wing or Tav who were sorely missed and didn’t put a foot wrong all evening but seeing as it traditionally goes to someone who played then the only one is Randolph who kept a clean sheet with a brilliant save but whose kicking left a lot to be desired all night.

On the drive home I heard a debate on Tees about playing with three supposedly at the back well if that was the tactic it certainly didn’t look remotely like anything close to it to me and if so then why would you move Fry out to displace Friend across one when Shotton was already an enforced disruption on the opposite flank? Tony tinkered far too much and the failings of the night rest upon his shoulders and his decisions alone despite Britt’s glaring miss. The continual failure to score at home and the poor tactical shuffle which screwed us on the night will be punished on Saturday against much better opponents than tonight. Strange how we can be top of the league yet upon leaving the Stadium feel almost as bad as when Trashcan was here. Patience wore thin tonight and the fans let their feelings be known. You can fool some of the people some of the time but tonight just stunk the Riverside out and left a bitter taste to boot.

Championship 2018-19: Week 13

Tue 23 Oct – 19:45: Boro v Rotherham
Sat 27 Oct – 12:30: Boro v Derby

Just when it had started to seem that the mere mention of having a chance to go top of the league had taken on Macbethian proportions in terms of bringing bad luck, the curse was lifted on Friday after Boro bewitched the Owls as they suffered a less than familiar defeat on home soil. At least we no longer have to contemplate referring to first place in the table as the Scottish position – which may for some conjure up the image of bad Karma with the usual prolonged tantric ascent up the table and another anticlimax.

For some Boro die-hards along for the ride, the idea of an uplifting journey would be getting stuck in slow-moving traffic on the A19 behind a refuse truck while the darkest of leaden skies rhythmically emptied their rain to the accompaniment of their personal compilation of Leonard Cohen’s 20 most depressing dirges. Yes, the mood music on Teesside is starting to show embryonic signs of unexpected optimism breaking out. Cries of Halleluja from the Boro faithful perhaps greeted the final whistle at Hillsborough as Tony Pulis’s team failed to let us down once more. Pre-arthritic knees that had been limbering up at half-time in preparation of being jerked in further disappointed were subsequently creaked back into their youthful position as those watching left with a promotion-hoping spring in their step. Of course, the murmur of wait until Saturday evening when we’ll be knocked back off the top by our rivals kept many from clicking their heels together – even if they were still able to manage such a manoeuvre.

However, the Championship is by definition a league of inconsistency and Boro’s failure not to miss an opportunity was magnified by our rivals as they instead indulged themselves by stealing our trend-setting clothes – Leeds continued their slide down the form table as nearly 8,000 travelling fans saw their day out end in defeat at Tony Mowbray’s Blackburn, West Brom saw their seven-game undefeated run end at Wigan and the Blades failed to cut it as they sheepishly left Derby without any points.

Boro now host two games at the Riverside this week, starting with the visit of Rotherham, who have now failed to win any of their last eight games – indeed, they’ve actually lost all of their six matches on the road this season, scoring just 2 goals and conceding 14. What could possibly go wrong? is a sentence nobody of ‘Typical Boro’ persuasion would thank anyone for asking – though at least we don’t have to add “It’s a chance to go top” since we’ve thankfully ticked that Schrodinger’s box without looking inside it. The Millers were promoted back to the Championship at their first attempt following relegation to League One the previous season. Boro last played the South Yorkshire team back in their 2015-16 promotion-winning season and the corresponding fixture saw Aitor Karanka’s side pick up three points thanks to a solitary Stewart Downing strike – perhaps an omen for the less prolific attacking midfielder. The game on Tuesday will also be Paul Warne’s 100th game in charge of the club in what has been his first managerial appointment since stepping up from being a Miller’s player.

In terms of team formation, the victory over Wednesday saw Tony Pulis revert back to having three central defenders with Dael Fry returning to the fold. The Boro manager had recently preferred to play a more conventional back-four in order to accommodate an extra forward as he looked for ways of improving the goals scored column. Whether he has had a change of heart, or it was simply down to players like Braithwaite and Saville being too tired after their international exertions, is perhaps something we will discover an hour before kick-off. Although the noises coming from the Boro boss seem to indicate that the Danish forward will be back in the team as he rates him as one of the best players in the league. Also likely to continue is Downing, who Pulis called “a proper player” as opposed perhaps to some of those who just seem somewhat inappropriate for the task at hand.

With Besic looking back to his best at Hillsborough and Clayton being his usual self then it would appear the only way to accommodate Braithwaite would be to either lose a central defender or drop Howson – which most realistically would mean the stifling of youth once more. Whatever happens, it will be important to retain the intensity displayed on Friday, which was so conspicuous by its absence before the international break. Apparently Pulis now blames himself for that after confessing to training his players too hard – though given that admission he should maybe also blame himself for failing to have more energetic players on the bench, like Wing and Tavernier.

On Saturday, Boro have once again been selected for TV in the early kick-off against Derby County – in fact the following three weekend fixtures against Stoke, Brentford and Villa are also on the box, which will have those who shelled out for a MFC live-stream season’s pass wondering if they’ll end up not getting their money’s worth. The Rams have been a little erratic under new coach Frank Lampard and have won six but lost four so far as they’ve crept up into the play-off positions. As they sit in fifth, they are currently at the top of a group of nine clubs just separated by three points, with his former Chelsea team-mate John Terry now on the coaching staff of Villa, who occupy the last of that section in 13th spot. Derby’s win over Sheffield United was only their second victory in the last seven outings, which included defeats at Bolton and surprisingly at Boro’s opponents on Tuesday, Rotherham.

In some ways, the Rams are like Boro as they look to bounce back from the disappointment of defeat in the play-off semi-finals last season – but with a new young manager still learning the ropes it could be a harder prospect. Although Boro will be hoping for a much better outcome than the corresponding fixture last season, which saw them crash to a 3-0 defeat thanks to a Matěj Vydra hat-trick. It was a game that Danny Ayala would want to forget after he first gave away a penalty earlier in the second half and then got sent off on the hour mark following a second yellow. The Spanish defender will do well to learn to avoid rash challenges and he was lucky to get away with his forearm smash last Friday too.

Boro followers will be hoping to see their team pick up another six points from these two Riverside games, though performances in recent weeks have been far from spellbinding and as Tony Pulis searches for the magic formula perhaps he could contemplate even more old school methods than normal. As you know, the Boro manager is quite open-minded when it comes to experimenting with different techniques to give him the edge over opponents. He may have possibly been interested to read this week of how a group of practising witches in America have decided to protest at the controversial appointment of Brett Kavanaugh to the US Supreme Court by placing a hex on him.

Though we learned that modern witches no longer feel compelled to invoke spells by gathering around a yew tree during a full moon but have instead provided details of how to cast their spell on their Facebook page – though it’s not clear if they’ve been friended by Sir Nick Clegg yet after he became the social media organisation’s head of global affairs after a disastrous spell as Liberal Democrat leader made most of his MPs disappear.

It would probably be sensible for Tony Pulis to delegate the preparation of the the potion to members of his staff as some of the ingredients listed may prove difficult for him to inconspicuously gather – especially the graveyard dirt and coffin nails, which would take some explaining if he’s inadvertently snapped at Linthorpe Cemetery on a smart phone by a passing taphophile as they make a headstone rubbing. Also listed as needed for the spell are a black candle, a broken mirror and some revenge oil – though before you start rummaging through your wife’s essential oil collection it’s unlikely she’ll have a flask of it unless you’ve forgot her birthday again.

Thankfully, revenge oil is available online and can even be purchased from Amazon with the sellers declaring “Our Sweet Revenge Oil was created for those who have been harmed to such a degree that simple reversing techniques fail to deliver adequate results” – before adding “We got a little creative with this blend, combining good old fashioned hoodoo herbs with those from ancient magic such as Bdellium and Cypress”. We are also informed that “Cypress is associated to Cyble, Goddess of the natural world who ruled over the dark arts and was invoked for her power to revenge” – before being warned “If you do not fear the karma associated with such spells, then this oil is sure to meet your needs” with the final disclaimer “for external use only” – in case anyone was thinking of swallowing the whole myth.

Incidentally, it’s always useful to read the Amazon customer reviews before deciding on whether to buy or not and some purchasers may possibly be encouraged by the following five-star rating: “It appears the warning I posted a year ago was removed, so I’m posting another one… a different one. Do not use this oil unless you KNOW what you’re doing, otherwise the results can be fatal. I would also suggest NOT using this indoors. Go outside.” – though it sounds like any law enforcement agencies browsing online may want to follow up these claims. You may also be interested to know that customers who purchased revenge oil also purchased ‘Chaos and Confusion Oil’, ‘Deadly Attraction Oil’ and my particular favourite ‘Crown of Success Oil for Victory’, which I’m sure will be on every Championship manager’s wish list. Indeed, a very popular oil with over 100 satisfied customers – though a few dissatisfied ones too with one rather miffed consumer giving it just one star with: “I became bankrupt after using it” and another begrudging three-star review from one woman: “It seemed to work for my husband, not for me. He was offered a job.” It probably just goes to prove that invoking magical spells is not an exact science.

Nevertheless, coaches are continually searching for that extra one or two percent that could make all the difference and in a tight race it could be worth a try for the Boro manager as he attempts to stay ahead of his rivals. As the three witches of Rockliffe, Pulis, Flemming and Woodgate, gather secretly to prepare the potion to see off one of their rivals, we can only hope that they’ve done their homework. As they begin their witches brew, the Boro manager enthusiastically declares “OK lads, I’ve printed out a photo of Frank Lampard and have bought some revenge oil online. Woody, have you got the graveyard dirt and coffin nails?” – “Yes Boss, though I could only get brass screws” replied his trusty lieutenant. “I suppose that will have to do. Curtis, did you get the rainwater from a thunderstorm?” – “Sorry Boss, there hasn’t been any thunder on Teesside this week”, came the disappointing reply. “Bugger, well it says we can also use toilet water instead, so off you pop to the gents Curtis”. The Boro manager then picks up his club pen as he prepares for the next stage. “OK, it says we have to first write out the curse on the back of the photo – I’ll just put ‘Lamps you loser’ to start with and we’ll see how it goes”.

As Flemming returns with some rather unpleasant smelling toilet water, Pulis continues reading the instructions. “Right, we fill half the jar with toilet water and the other half with urine – OK, if one of you lads will do the honours we can then quickly put the lid back on”. He’s met with blank looks from both Curtis and Woody – “OK, I’ll do it my bloody self you pair of wimps, now turn your backs”. They arrange the photo with the jar of urine and continue with the instructions. “Now, Woody break that mirror and arrange some broken pieces around the photo” – “But isn’t that bad luck boss?” he questions – “Surely you don’t believe that nonsense, give it here then.” The Boro manager smashes the mirror and then Flemming hands over the candle – “What… this is a tea light. It’s supposed to be a black candle for Christ’s sake”. Pulis is not impressed but improvises by rubbing a bit of boot polish on it. “So, I’ll just roll the candle in the graveyard dirt, sprinkle the revenge oil, then light the candle and stick it on the lid of the jar and we’re done – the three points are as good as in the bag!” The trio of cackling witches high-five each other and head off for the next training session as Pulis warns that it’s best if none of them mention any of this to Steve Gibson.

So another busy week at Boro will hopefully see them continue their spell at the top of the table as the Championship cauldron comes to the boil. However, the triskaidekaphobics among you will need to avoid looking at the table too carefully until after game 14 on Tuesday – though the omens are looking good for Tony Pulis to hit the magic two points per game measure that will hopefully see many supporters demons being exercised.

Championship 2018-19: Week 12

Fri 19 Oct – 19:45: Sheffield Wednesday v Boro

Boro’s harmless globe-trotters returned to Teesside this week as they top the bill on Friday evening and prepare to wow the TV viewers with another display of unbelievable skills and fancy footwork. Although Tony Pulis appears somewhat upset that Boro are playing Wednesday on Friday instead of Saturday and perhaps thinks the concept is far too demanding for many of his players – who gave the distinct impression last time out that they didn’t know what day it was as they failed to turn up against Forest. The Boro manager believes it’s unfair that his club have ten players dashing back from international duty for the early game compared to the Owls solitary player screeching to a halt outside Hillsborough.

Some on Teesside may be surprised to discover that their team is magnet for international players – though others have long suspected our recruitment department probably Google the phrase “current international” and then starts at page 100 to beat the competition to hidden gems. However, with 211 countries affiliated to FIFA, who select players for several teams at various levels, then you’d be surprised if anyone on more than five grand a week wasn’t representing their country in some capacity – after all Theresa May has to do it for just three grand a week and as far as we know hasn’t even got time to get a tattoo of Brexit means Brexit on her back.

Tony Pulis has no doubt spent the last couple of weeks trying to work out how to get Boro back to their early season best. Reports have emerged that he’s pinpointed the problem as being that his strikers simply need to take their chances. Although, it’s still not clear if ‘Boro striker’ is actually a job title or in fact an oxymoron. Few are confident that either Britt Assombalonga, Jordan Hugill, Rudy Gestede or even Ashley Fletcher have what it takes to bang them in on a consistent basis – the fact that their manger has now joined the ranks of the doubters must be of concern to those looking for someone to spearhead the promotion challenge.

Of course, it’s not just down to the strikers and in recent weeks the midfield has not looked overly creative or capable of providing that killer pass – or indeed appeared like hitting the target themselves. The last midfielder who seemed to show an eye for a goal was George Saville and he was promptly rewarded by being retreated to the holding role where he subsequently bombed against Forest. Though to be fair to Saville, everyone bar Downing bombed against Forest as they easily put in the worst performance of the season in front of a disgruntled Riverside crowd.

Talking of explosive midfield talent, Tony Pulis declared this week that he was delighted with Lewis Wing and that: “He’s come on a bomb since going out on loan. The lad has come on a bomb.” I suppose it makes a change from other recently acquired midfielders who cost a bomb and look more like a suspect device than a carefully guided missile. I suspect the former Shildon winger is probably wondering when such praise will manifest itself with a starting berth. Pulis seems to be trying to use him as an example to entice other young players at the club to go out on loan. He cited his loan spell last season as the main reason he’s “pushed on” but it’s hardly encouragement to hear “Lewis has got a long way to go yet, but we’re delighted with him. Given time, he’s got a great chance.” Though with his previous performances this season it’s hard to see why his time hasn’t already come and how long exactly is the way that he needs to go? hopefully not all the way to Villa!

After a shaky start where they lost two and drew one of their opening games, Sheffield Wednesday have only suffered defeat in just one of their last nine games, which was against Forest at the hands of the newly converted Aitor ‘attack is the best form of defence’ Karanka. Under the permanently sad-looking Dutchman Jos Luhukay, the Owls now sit just three points behind Boro in sixth spot and they will be looking to make their manager threaten a smile with another victory. Although this fixture traditionally sees both managers being shown the door following the final whistle after both Garry Monk and Carlos Carvalhal were given early Christmas red cards from their chairman last season. Nevertheless, I suspect you’d get decent odds on the same happening this season if you head to the bookies with the daftest of quids. Boro supporters main worry will be the fear of Adam Reach scoring the inevitable goal against his former club – he has in fact netted twice in the last three games, including that screamer against Leeds. Whether he’ll prove that academy graduates need to got out on permanent loan in order make a career for themselves is perhaps a discussion for another day.

Following that poor performance before the international break, where Tony Pulis compared his players to a “bag of potatoes”, he may be struggling on how to separate those who can Smash the league from the other spuds in the squad – though other table-topping dehydrated instant mashed-potato products are available. Perhaps he just got all the players in circle and said “OK lads get your spuds out” before eliminating individuals with “one potato, two potato, three potato, four, five potato, six potato, seven potato, more – sorry Wingy you’re the first one out…” Anyway, whatever team we end up with let’s hope Pulis gets them playing out of their skins and Boro’s season doesn’t end up half-baked. But before I leave, I’m contractually obliged to state that if Boro win on Friday night then they can go top of the league, which is often an overly optimistic statement that is sadly usually followed by the phrase ‘another missed opportunity’ – I suspect Tony Pulis will be hoping he won’t have to raid his book of vegetable metaphors come the post-match press conference.

Some history on the Owls

As most of you will probably know Sheffield FC is the oldest established club in the World having been founded in 1857 and are still existence although actually playing over the border in Dronfield, Derbyshire. Our opponents tonight, like many clubs, were formed from a meeting with the Wednesday Cricket Club and started life at Bramhall Lane, now of course the home of Sheffield United.

The Wednesday FC were actually the first club to win a match with a ‘golden goal’ in extra time and in semi-darkness against Garrick in the Cromwell Cup match in 1868, except of course it was not known a ‘golden goal’ at the time. They had the distinction also being the first club to appoint a professional player called James Lang in 1876 before professional footballers came into vogue in the ensuing 4 years. In 1882 they severed relations with the Wednesday Cricket Club.

Having lost most of their players to professional clubs The Wednesday FC club went through a barren spell, they decided to turn professional in 1887 and moved to New Grove and eventually to Hillsborough in Owlerton, hence their nickname of The Owls. In the meantime Sheffield United were founded in 1889 and adopted Bramhall Lane as their home. As with all clubs from the same city there began a fierce rivalry between the two clubs. There is even a rumour, unsubstantiated I have to say, that Wednesday fans will not eat bacon because it reminds them of United’s coloured stripes.

The Wednesday FC were promoted to the old First Division in 1900 as Champions, two years before the Boro, and were Champions in 1903 and 1904 before changing their name to Sheffield Wednesday in 1929 when they again became Champions again in two successive seasons. Since then, especially in the 1950s they became known as a yo-yo club, relegated three times but each time gaining promotion in the following season.

Hillsborough has often been a venue for FA Cup Semifinals and notoriously the scene of the greatest sports tragedy in English football history when 94 people lost their lives in the Liverpool v Nottingham Forest match in April 1989. Indeed Boro won their FA Cup Replay against Chesterfield there in 1997. However it hasn’t been a particularly good hunting ground for Boro until recently. Boro went into their last match in the 1988/89 season in 17th position never having been in the bottom three all season, but lost 0-1 at Hillsborough and were relegated. However Boro have won their last two matches there and won 3 of their last 6 there. There has been only one draw there since the Second World War in the 1973/74 season, but only 7 wins and 16 defeats.

Following on from his In2Views article with award winning columnist, broadcaster and journalist Doug Weatherall, Original Fat Bob has once again met up with him as Doug recalls his days involved with football and sportsmen at the highest level. We delve into his diaries to reveal never previously told facts and intimate stories, which helps to bring back to life what it was like to meet the footballing heroes and be part of the footballing community. Doug was lucky enough to be able to share moments in those great and heady days or commiserate at the dark times that often everyone in the football world endures.  This Diary posted on our blog, is a view on the life and career of Stan Anderson…

Stan Anderson joined Boro in 1965, he first captained the team before becoming player-manager in 1966 and continued as boss until 1973

When Doug and I considered who should be the subject for our next chapter when we opened the Diary, we both agreed it had to be the review of the life of, the late, great, Stan Anderson. Doug recently attended the funeral of Stan, accompanied by some of the great past players of his era. Included in the list of mourners were: David Mills, Len Ashurst, who delivered the eulogy at Stan’s funeral, Bobby Moncur, Mike Horswill, Jim Montgomery, George Herd, Doug Weatherall, Brian Usher & Bobby Kerr.

Stan died at his home in Doncaster, on Sunday 10th June 2018 aged 84, following a week where he had been hospitalized with chest pains. He was always naturally fit and was still a keen golfer right up until this year when he became ill.

“Stan was just a gentleman and a magnificent player,” said his former team-mate and Sunderland club ambassador Jim Montgomery. “I never heard him say a bad word about anybody. He was one of the best players I ever played with and he left Sunderland far too early.”

He was an all-round sportsman and excelled at his golf. “He would complete rounds in 77 or 78 shots, which was under his age and quite remarkable,” noted Montgomery at the funeral.

Stan Anderson was born in Horden in County Durham on 27 February 1934 and has the unique distinction of being the only player to have captained the big three football teams of the North East; Sunderland, Newcastle and Middlesbrough.

He joined Sunderland in 1949 as an amateur, signing as a professional on his 17th birthday in 1951 and made his debut in October 1952 at Roker Park against Portsmouth. Stan scored the first of his 35 Sunderland goals against Newcastle who he eventually joined in 1963. The only Sunderland player to be capped by England during the 1960s, Stan had captained his country at under-23 level and won an England B cap. One of his two full England caps is on permanent display at the Stadium of Light.

He didn’t really want to leave Sunderland and go to Newcastle, but he knew that Joe Harvey the manager was desperate for him to sign.

He is quoted in the book ‘Match of My Life’, when he reflected on his 1963 departure for Newcastle United.

“I knew there’d be trouble if I switched stripes and I was from a family of dyed in the wool red and whites – playing for the team I supported was always a privilege and a pleasure for me.”

He added: “I never wanted to leave Sunderland, but eventually Browny [Manager Alan Brown] bombed me out.”

After captaining Newcastle to promotion, he completed his north-east hat-trick by playing for Middlesbrough as captain.

He succeeded Raich Carter as Middlesbrough manager in April 1966 and remained at the club before resigning early in 1973, to be replaced initially on a temporary basis by Harold Shepherdson and then permanently by Jack Charlton. In his time at the Boro, the club were relegated from and then subsequently promoted back to the Football League second division. After leaving Middlesbrough he managed in Greece for AEK Athens FC. Returning to England, he became boss at Queens Park Rangers, Doncaster Rovers and Bolton Wanderers where he managed a young Peter Reid, before leaving management after resigning in 1981. He also had a spell as assistant manager with Manchester City. He later finished his football career as a scout for various clubs including Newcastle.

Doug’s Eulogy to Stan Anderson

OFB: Doug made this note just after Stan had died and contacted me. This is what he wrote then:

The North-East has lost one its most significant figures. Only he captained the area’s three main clubs. And I have lost a friend.

My most poignant memory of him was the night of Sunderland’s first relegation from the top division. We had travelled by train to London from Portsmouth where Sunderland’s fate had been sealed. We stayed at the Kings Cross’s Great Northern Hotel. While some of us downed our sorrows there Stan had just wandered around the West End. When he eventually returned to the hotel he told me just how relegation had hit him. A Horden, County Durham, lad, and a Sunderland fan, it hurt him deeply. Yet he had seen the happy faces of West Ham United players and fans as they arrived back in London from the North-East, knowing their club would take their place in the top grade.

Stan Anderson grew up in house where his father supported Sunderland and his mother Newcastle and went on to captain both sides as well as Boro

Happily, I also shared Stan’s joy when, captaining Second Division Sunderland, he scored the two goals which beat First Division Arsenal in the FA Cup at Roker. He was the picture of joy, too, as he celebrated Newcastle’s promotion to the top grade by setting a new fashion – by flinging his shirt to joyous fans at St. James’.

While his Dad was a Sunderland fan, his Mum’s family club were the black-and-whites. The best tribute he was paid after he left Middlesbrough came from Jack Charlton, who replaced him as Middlesbrough boss. Big Jack said Stan had left him with a good squad of players. I hope Boro fans still appreciate his contribution to their club’s history.

Diary Extracts:

OFB: Did you know Stan from his early days?

DW: I was very much aware of him while he was still a schoolboy. Since I lived at Seaham, County Durham. I heard of this Horden Colliery lad who was showing class while playing for East Durham’s under-15s side. If my memory serves me right I saw him in action at Shotton Colliery Welfare and was impressed. He then progressed with distinction with Horden juniors before Sunderland signed him.

OFB: When did you first encounter Stan?

DW: As a Roker fan, I watched him play in Sunderland’s notable first team. He was a rarity: A North-East lad alongside costly members of the so-called Bank of England side.  He turned out with great names like Len Shackleton and Trevor Ford and didn’t look out of place.

OFB: Was he instantly recognizable as a footballer who was destined for greatness?

DW: He was always a quality passer with two good feet. He could defend reasonably, but he was mainly a creative wing-half. In that era of 2-3-5 formations he could dispatch fine cross-field passes to his left-winger. You don’t see a lot of that these days; more’s the pity!

OFB: Do you think that he tried to emulate his style of play, on any individual player who played in his position?

DW: As a Sunderland supporter himself, he knew the high value of those long, accurate passes. He’d seen Willie Watson and Arthur Wright deliver them from wing-half positions.

OFB: When did you first get to know him personally?

DW: I got to know him personally and as a pal in my early days as a sports reporter. Apart from interviewing him about current football affairs, we could chat about our days as schoolboy players. Remember I’d played for Sunderland and District Boys, my team-mates having included Jack Webb and Billy Beadnell who, like Stan, had joined the professional red-and-whites.

OFB: Did you have long chats with him about his football?

DW: Yes, we did. Whilst he knew I was a professional journalist, he knew I wanted him and, indeed, all the other North-East clubs to succeed.

OFB: What do you think was his most memorable game, his own individual performance as a player?

DW: He, of course, often shone, but his best performance I remember most was in an FA Cup third-round tie with First Division Arsenal in 1961. Sunderland were then in the second grade, but, the skipper Stan inspired his team as he scored both goals in in a deserved 2-1 win. His side were to make the quarter-finals before losing in a White Hart Lane replay to League and Cup double winners Tottenham, Spurs captain Danny Blanchflower having conceded that his truly great team had narrowly escaped losing at Roker Park.

Despite Stan’s obvious talent, he only managed two caps for England (pictured besides Bobby Moore) due to intense competition in his position

OFB: Did you see him play for England?

DW: I didn’t see either of his two appearances for the full England team, but I know the main reason he didn’t gain more caps. Competition for wing-half places was so intense. Remember skipper Billy Wright, of Wolves, was generally the automatic right-half choice for ages.

OFB: What was your best personal and most enjoyable experience watching him as a player?

DW: I was so pleased for him in that Cup success over Arsenal, but I was even more delighted for him when, as captain of Newcastle, he led them to promotion to the top grade as Division Two champions. His transfer from Sunderland had been controversial. The Roker manager, then preferring Northern Irishman Martin Harvey for the No. 4 shirt, had negotiated Stan’s transfer to Sunderland’s most intense rivals. Fans on both Wearside and Tyneside couldn’t believe it. Stan himself had thought he’d be around Roker much longer. Stan’s Mum was from a Newcastle-supporting family, so you can imagine her delight and that of the Geordie masses when promotion was sealed with victory over Bolton at St. James’. In the celebrations Stan and his colleagues were in the directors’ box. And Stan was the first to set a pattern for years to come. He was the first to take off his shirt and hurl it into the hordes on the pitch. I never saw him happier. The saddest I’d seen him was late at night in London after Sunderland had been relegated for the first time in their history even though they’d won at Portsmouth that day. While some of us had drowned sorrows in the Great Northern Hotel Stan had wandered around West London. To rub salt into his wounds, he’d seen West Ham and their jubilant fans arrive back at King’s Cross Station. They were celebrating promotion to the division Sunderland had been in for 65 years.

OFB: What was his worst game in your experience?

DW: His worst game for Sunderland was probably his last. That was a 3-3 draw with Cardiff at Roker. His direct opponent was the great Ivor Allchurch, who won their personal encounter hands down. Coincidentally, Stan’s Newcastle debut was against Cardiff and again Allchurch was the master.

OFB: Did you follow his managerial career after he retired as a player and were you still in contact with him?

DW: Of course, I reported his transfer from Newcastle to Boro and was in regular contact with him as, in my opinion, he did fine work for Boro, first as their captain and then as manager

OFB: Who was in your opinion the manager that had the greatest influence on his career and why?

DW: Stan was very much his own man, but he learned a lot from Manager Brown at Sunderland. How, for instance, to deal with players, and how NOT to deal with them.

OFB: Which opposing team and which player did he fear playing against?

DW: Mentioning Ivor Allchurch again would probably be the answer to that one!

OFB: Do you know who was his favourite player of all time and why?

DW: Not too sure, but since he’d seen Len Shackleton at his amazing best, Shack would be an obvious contender.

OFB: What do you remember about Stan the most?

DW: Apart from his fine creative ability, I recall his warmth and friendliness as a human being. I recall, too, his being a good judge of a player. Fans should remember that Jack Charlton was always grateful for the playing talent Stan bequeathed him. Remember Jack’s squad was the nearest to winning the League title.

OFB: A huge thank you Doug, for taking the time to open your Diary again, revealing this latest chapter to Diasboro and our readers.

Stan Anderson, born 27 February 1934 in Horden, County Durham – died 10 June 2018 in Doncaster aged 84

Middlesbrough		Nottm Forest
		Lolley Grabban ▮ Robinson	49′ 77′ 80′
Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	53% 17 4 11 15	Possession Shots On target Corners Fouls	47% 16 5 4 16

Boro Bottlers Stumped

Today welcomed the return (again) of Aitor Karanka, to some a harshly treated under-appreciated Boro Manager to others one who had simply ran out of ideas and tactical nous to take us any further. Whatever the colour of your views on him he did get us promoted and without that promotion financially we would not be one of the strongest clubs in the Championship which considering where the Club was financially when he first arrived his tenure has to be marked down as a success after being stuck in the second tier for seven years.

His Forest side arrived in a steady run of form, gradually improving as the season has progressed in typical AK style, nothing spectacular, steady, dependable, well organised and disciplined. The word from the Trent was that AK no longer tries to win 0-0 and endeavours nowadays to have some attacking intent rather than relying on binary results in his favour.

The big Boro selection question was if Clayts would come back into the side after serving his one match suspension or would TP stick with the same midfield from Tuesday night. Considering the two Boro goals came from midfielders it would be interesting to see if our player of the season to date would be benched. AK had doubts over Joe Lolley and had slim hopes for Striker Hillal Soudani. Winger Diogo Goncalves was definitely missing serving the last of a three game ban.

The stats showed that Forest were without an away win in their last eleven league games so a Typical Boro occasion for the return of Aitor had crossed minds pre Kick Off. The anticipated main threat for Boro would be Lewis Grabban who is a top Striker at this level and a handful for any defender to keep quiet. The teams when officially announced had a few surprises, Lolley was deemed fit which was to be bad news for Ryan Shotton and Grabban was benched in favour of Daryl Murphy who presumably was selected as being deemed more suited to counter Boro’s back line of giants especially when getting back defending set pieces. For Boro TP went with the same side that destroyed one of the Championship’s worst teams for 20 minutes on Tuesday night and then sat back and clung on for the last 70 minutes. I wasn’t comfortable at Clayton being excluded but my anxieties before the start were soon to be multiplied a thousand fold soon after.

Boro kicked off which was about the most possession they had for the opening twenty minutes. Actually after two minutes it was clear that AK has had a born again renaissance and played cavalier swashbuckling, aggressive attacking football with tempo. Who would have thought it possible? Perhaps he has reflected on his time here and also witnessed the fall from grace of his former mentor. As his Forest side got going quickly Boro were being ripped apart down the flanks. Friend was left exposed and destroyed by being left in a 2v1 scenario repeatedly while Braithwaite seemingly felt his role was to be that of a mere spectator for the opening thirty minutes leaving George to get on with it on his own.

As embarrassing as it was to see George tortured he was doing pretty well compared to his opposite compatriot who started half asleep and then spent the rest of the game being ripped apart in a woeful performance that left us exposed defensively every time Lolley went on a run. Shotton quite simply had no answer to him and was routinely skinned all afternoon consequently left chasing shadows and usually five yards behind them at that.

Centrally Ayala looked a bit nervy alongside Flint and no wonder as their one man defensive shield was sat on the bench. I didn’t think George Saville was worth one million let alone eight at the time of his arrival but if his performance today is anything to go by I hope his “loan” is of the Sean St Ledger variety. Maybe playing in front of the centre backs isn’t his game but if it isn’t it was astonishing that TP didn’t see how outplayed, outclassed and totally lost he was. “Astonishing” may be too strong a word under normal circumstances but five minutes into the game it was clear that the team selection and tactics were wrong and not by just a little bit.

Besic seemingly thought that his Ipswich goal meant that he now had a free pass to stroll through the game. Braithwaite was wasted and lost at out wide left, Howson seemed to pop up in desperate situations trying to save blushes but overall our midfield was a dysfunctional, out-battled and confused mess.

Our RB and LB were having a torrid time and up front Hugill may be a footballer but based on today it was hard to tell as he was diving before the ball was even being played up to him. Football is a difficult enough game but trying to play it sprawled on the floor or sat on your backside must make it far more difficult than is normally required. Like Saville I hope his tenure has the contractual detail of the Sean St. Ledger variety.

That leaves us with two players, Downing and Randolph. Randolph wasn’t to blame for his defenders and midfielders looking like Virgins at one of Caligula’s New Year’s Eve parties so I am happy to absolve him of what unfolded before him. Downing was immense, another nine Stewart Downing’s and we might have nicked a draw but despite his solitary efforts he couldn’t play eleven opponents on his own.

On thirty minutes something bizarre happened, someone must have had a remote “on switch” for Martin Braithwaite as he suddenly awoke from his previous comatose state and started playing, dancing in and out of the Forest defence, rattling them and even having a shot deflected off the cross bar. Hallelujah, finally it looked like we could maybe, just maybe might make a game of it after all. Earlier in the day Leeds had managed a late goal to grab a draw against Brentford which presented Boro with the opportunity to top the Championship tonight and over the International break. That pressure was clearly too much for the playing staff and the Manager as they completely bottled it and were fortunate to reach half time at 0-0.

Phew! Was the general feeling as the half time whistle thankfully went with another poor Refereeing display only topped by an atrocious tactical car crash by TP. No doubt he will bemoan the Officials again but it was he who selected the same side as against Ipswich requiring them to play two games in five days which must have been exhausting for them or it certainly looked like it. There was no way he could send his charges back out organised in the same manner and with the same personnel.

The first half was the worst ever witnessed under his tenure and surely he could see and accept that he screwed it up and got the entire thing wrong. Nope! Out came the same eleven at the start of the second half, the varied utterances of disbelief around me in the North Stand are not suitable to be put into print but they were more colourful and passionate than that which we witnessed in the opening 45 minutes from those in Red Shirts.

Forest kicked off and it was a case of as you were. We were struggling, our defence was under pressure exposed without the protection of Clayts and the inevitable happened when the cumbersome but effective Murphy fed Lolley who launched a cracking volley that sailed across the Riverside in almost dramatic slow motion and nestled beautifully in Randolph’s top corner. Sometimes as sickening as it is you just have to sit back and appreciate an artist at work. It was almost Adam Reach good that’s how good it was, Ronaldo himself would have been proud of it, almost Beckhamesque in fact! It was a fitting goal to be the first scored by an away side this season.

0-1 and TP would now have to respond to belatedly repair his defensive frailties and midfield morass and the perennially prostrate Hugill. It took another ten minutes after the goal for Pulis to react, why it took ten minutes I have no idea because it was blatantly obvious after the opening ten minutes of the first half that changes and drastic ones at that needed to be made. At this point in time Downing was still magnificent as he had been all afternoon but Brathwaite was now supporting, asking questions, looking lively and the one most obvious to tip things back in our favour. Besic seemed a little livelier but Saville was still poor and that is being polite, “off the boil” or “the game passed him by” are other tactful euphemisms for the Northern Irishman’s struggles.

With thirty minutes remaining TP made what was possibly the most disconcerting, baffling, confusing and dysfunctional substitutions all at one time I have witnessed by a Boro Manager in a long time and I include Trashcan in that. Braithwaite went off with a chorus of boos directed at the decision to be replaced by Gestede. At that time apart from Downing the Dane was the only other player actually playing and not panicking and actually looked like he just might unlock the Forest defence who had lost Dawson through injury in the first half after an ankle injury and Friend running through him like a quarterback a short while later.

Just as a reincarnation of one of Redcar Beach’s finest rides had ran onto the pitch we lost another as Hugill managed to stay on his feet long enough to coordinate his lower limbs far longer than he had manged all afternoon to depart the pitch. In what seemed more like a desperate “old player” haunting his ex-employers wish than a cleverly thought through tactical piece of ingenuity on TP’s part Assombalonga entered the fray as the West Ham loanee’s replacement. Besic was the final part of the tripe sorry triple TP conundrum being replaced by the greatly missed Clayton. How Saville remained on the pitch was a mystery wrapped up within in that very conundrum.

Balls were launched up field but invariably more at Britt than Rudy (scratches head) which came to nothing but when the balls were in the general area of Gestede it either bounced off his head in an untoward direction or he managed to foul his opponent in an ungainly manner conceding a free kick in the process. Britt was put through by Howson in a well worked move setting him up only to hit a low shot from ten yards out too close to Pantilimon who dived and collected all too easily. Minutes later Britt had another great chance as he managed to direct a header wide of the goal from a few yards out. We did hope that if another three clear chances came his way he may actually get close to troubling the giant keeper but it wasn’t to be.

Meanwhile before all that Boro excitement Lolley nearly added a second which was blocked by Randolph with Murphy charging in to try and seal the deal for Forest. Karanka then sent on Grabban to give the ageing Striker a deserved break and the tortured minds of the Boro defence another nightmare scenario to deal with. Aden Flint was playing up front more than in defence as the ploy to send Gestede on to win high balls just wasn’t working despite his enthusiastic jumping. It’s a shame that we had to rely on that tactic considering that any players who could create something had now either been subbed or worse, deemed not required for the bench thanks to all these shiny new TP recruits.

Five minutes from coming on Grabban had grabbed his goal after a ball played across the Boro box was tapped in by the clinical striker. The build up to the goal is best glossed over but suffice to say Saville was involved and not in a good way. We did have a similar and probably easier opportunity minutes earlier but the reactions of our fresh shiny new Strike force were somewhat delayed (read non-existent). Fears of being reported to the RSPCA by the stewards for abuse of Muffin (those under sixty may struggle with that one) curtailed responses in the North Stand!

To rub salt in the wound Forest even gifted us the chance to redeem something in the final few moments by going down to ten men as Robinson received his marching orders for a second yellow in trying to emulate Jordan Hugill but he just hasn’t mastered the artistic, twist, turn, grimace, angst and look of arm spread unfairness as he spread-eagled himself. Near the end we did have a series of headers in the Forest box that reminded me of beach holidays in speedos on the Costa’s from a few decades back but there was far more competitiveness in those drunken head tennis games from memory. Gestede did actually score but he was adjudged to have fouled Pantilimon. I’m not so sure that he did but the Ref probably figured if he managed to get the ball into the net it must have been through foul play and erred on the side of probability. It made little difference anyway and was far more than we deserved as if ever there was a game where Boro were lucky to get zero it was this one.

A crescendo of boos greeted the final whistle which in my opinion was far too complimentary. MOM was Downing whose nearest competitor was a young lass who served me in the concourse who without a single days training at Rockliffe was managing to serve burgers, pints and operate a till simultaneously. Today wasn’t just a bad day at the office, to say that would be to sweep evidence under the carpet. Signs were there at Ipswich despite the scoreline on the night that we can’t dominate and impose ourselves on teams. The eulogy of Wing and Tavernier just grew by several volumes today (and I haven’t commented on the heated “Bamford out and Hugill in” debate a few rows behind me that was in overdrive mode in the dying minutes). There was an unhealthy series of mumbled agreements of a Manager desperately justifying his own buys on the walk back down the Riverside Road. Something has changed recently and not for the better, what that something is will be up to TP to identify or perhaps admit to.

Championship 2018-19: Week 10

Tue 2 Oct – 19:45: Ipswich v Boro
Sat 6 Oct – 15:00: Boro v Forest

They say in space no-one can hear you scream, but for those football followers inhabiting the rarefied atmosphere on Teesside, there was still a distinct audible sound of pain emanating from Planet Boro on Saturday following another opportunity missed. Indeed, before the misguided sentence ‘Boro have a chance to go top’ is even completed, the follicles of many are preparing to part company with their keratin proteins in anticipation of hair being once more torn out in frustration. Though it was always tempting fate when launching a superfluous third kit in Real Madrid white that Boro’s Galacticos would put in a performance that never got off the ground – let alone one deemed even remotely out of this world. Still, the sound of the Teesside travelling army singing “we’re the finest team in football, the world has ever seen” may have been evidence that some were perhaps living in a parallel universe.

By far the happiest people on Teesside will possibly have been those who had paid to watch the beam-back from the KCOM stadium at the Riverside and were subsequently refunded after the event was predictably cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances. Although I suspect many of the Boro faithful who had made the trip to Hull may have wished that they could have also been beamed back to Teesside during the half-time interval after the players from both sides had shown little in the way of enterprise. Unexpectedly caught in a Strachanesque time-warp, many spaced-out supporters probably struggled to cling on to consciousness after sympathetically giving each other a Vulcan death grip in an attempt to dull the experience – before gasping “It was football Jim but not as we know it” as they were admitted to sickbay at James T Cook hospital.

It doesn’t take a dilithium crystal ball to see a warped future where a team without creative players fails to create chances. All the vital signs of a team struggling with the alien concept of passing the ball accurately forward were there to see and many have called for the next generation of academy graduates to be given their chance instead. As the conditioning team try to pick the bones out of latest matchday biometric data from the Boro camp, some are anticipating that it’s unlikely to show any signs of life. Whilst the recent performances may have left quite a few stunned, the Boro manager appears unfazed by calls to seek out new life in his squad and boldly go where no Tony Pulis team has gone before. Nevertheless, seeking out the strange new world of attacking football still seems light years away as he’s seemingly a man on a mission of discovering what to try next.

While still averaging 1.9 points per game, Boro remain statistically close to achieving that stellar goal of automatic promotion and if most nervous Boro followers had been offered third spot after ten games, they probably would have bitten your hand off once they’d finished with their fingernails. Though that statistic may be hiding the continued downward trend of points being returned, which once peaked at an average 2.6 per game after the first five matches in comparison to just 1.2 from the last five. Indeed, if Boro lose at Ipswich they will drop below our opponents on Tuesday in the six-game form table – the Tractor Boys are chugging along in 21st and Boro are currently 9th but would likely fall to around 18th following defeat with just 6 points from 6 games.

Of course victory at Portman Road could see Boro climb to top spot and we can once again contemplate an international break staring at the table while we recalibrate our glasses from half-empty to half-full, if not overflowing. Despite losing only one of their last five games, Ipswich remain in the bottom three after failing to register a single victory this season under new manager Paul Hurst. The 44-year old joined the Suffolk club from League Two side Shrewsbury after taking them to both the play-off and EFL Trophy finals last season – though unfortunately they lost both.

Hurst was apparently happy to become Ipswich manager under financial constraints and was said to be comfortable with the £3m transfer budget he was given, which should indicate the potential gulf between the two sides. Although Ipswich have lost four games this season, they have drawn all five of their home games and were unlucky not to win at Birmingham at the weekend after leading 2-0 at half-time. It could be another tight game as Hurst’s side have only conceded three goals in their last four home outings and Boro may find their chances on goal are limited – even by recent standards.

Tony Pulis has not yet settled on a way to play effectively having failed to sign the genuine wide players he coveted in the summer and Boro are struggling to find solutions on how to add creativity to their game. Although Pulis is regarded as old school, he has embraced modern methods and the use of technology for monitoring his players fitness and performance. Perhaps the Boro manager could seek to emulate those in Silicon Valley who design and conceive the ideas and products on which much of our modern sport and lifestyles now depend on. Thinking outside the box, or indeed inside it, is not a trait normally associated with a Tony Pulis team and now may be the time to experiment with the latest trends in the high-tech industry that many use to improve creativity.

It’s now commonplace among the high-performing geeks of Silicon Valley to self-medicate by micro-dosing psychedelic drugs such as LSD and Magic Mushrooms. Many believe it improves their productivity and creativity, with some saying it makes them feel more excited about their work, while others claim it also lifts the fog of depression – though not to be confused with the smog of depression that rarely lifts for Boro followers, which is not so much a condition but a way of life. Whether the club will also contemplate micro-dosing the complimentary pre-match drink in order to get the crowd excited about watching another limited Tony Pulis display is another matter – though it’s probably highly unethical and risks those who may down two or three pints before kick-off hallucinating to the point where they may start seeing imaginary goals.

The practice is reportedly widespread among the Californian elites and it’s prompted Imperial College to undertake a blind trial this month with those workers currently self-medicating. Though just to be clear, a blind trial is not how the Boro recruitment team identify players but involves giving some participants a placebo instead so they don’t know if it’s the real thing or not – which I should repeat is not comparable to the recruitment team’s assessment of players. Incidentally, the Swiss scientist Albert Hofmann, who first synthesised LSD in 1936 was reported to have micro-dosed the drug into his old age – he actually only died in 2008 at the age of 102 and had claimed a few years earlier that his hallucinogenic days were well behind him, along with that purple dog that kept following him. He referred to LSD as his problem child and was said to have been disturbed by the cavalier use of the drug in the sixties counter-culture.

Nevertheless, putting credence in anecdotal claims of the rich and powerful elites of Silicon Valley, who some claim are exhibiting signs of being borderline psychopaths, is perhaps something that should be taken with a large micro-dose of salt. Not only are some experimenting with self-medication with psycho-active compounds but others, such as the multi-millionaire CEO of several internet start-up companies, Serge Faguet, has embarked on a regime that he labels bio-hacking. It involves technologically assisted monitoring of bodily functions that then automatically sends signals to his smartphone on when he needs to self-administered injections of hormones and a daily regime of popping over 60 capsules with a strict diet and exercise regimes. The aim of the 32-year old is to live for ever and even plans to ultimately merge into a robot to become an ultra human. He also has declared he won’t have children as they are bad ROI (return on investment) and shuns the complication of relationships in favour of keeping several women on special retainers for his physical needs, who he rewards for their time with expensive gifts and paid-for flats – while being quite adamant that they are “definitely not prostitutes”.

Of course, experiencing the sensation of living for ever is available to many on Teesside, as time can sometimes appear to pass so slowly when watching a Boro attack build that it’s often confused with eternity as onlookers wait for something of note to judge the passing of time – though it’s sometimes a fine balance between feeling immortal and also losing the will to live. The early doors of perception were that Tony Pulis was going to open our minds to a brave new world of Championship success. However, current performances may suggest that no-one gets out here alive and the Boro manager may have to get prepared to ride out the storm if his team fail to break on through into the Premier League.

It may just sound like the fantasy world of a disturbed individual seeking immortality but there are indeed very rich powerful people actively pursuing this dream. Self-styled Bond villain and reckless Tweeter, billionaire Elon Musk of Tesla fame and planned human colonisation of Mars, has argued that humans need to become cyborgs to survive the inevitable robot uprising. Those who don’t like the way their bolshie Flymo sometimes approaches them, may be interested to know that Musk is starting work on developing an era of transhumanism with his new brain-computer interface company, Neuralink. Plus former CEO of Google Ventures, Bill Maris, has formed Calico (short for California Life Company), with the single aim to “solve death” and I’m sure he’ll give everything to succeed or at the very least die trying. Also former Facebook president, Sean Parker, declared that because he’s a billionaire he would have the resources to live to 160 and imagined “I’m going to be part of this class of immortal overlords.” Though the most important question is which one of these potential billionaire megalomaniac cyborgs will take over from Steve Gibson as Boro owner if he decides to shun immortality himself.

The acid test for Tony Pulis is whether his team can gain promotion and it has looked in recent games that some of the players appear on a different wavelength as they failed to either turn up or tune in before dropping out of the automatic promotion places. Although it may be too soon to advocate swapping the team coach for a magic bus and resorting to psychedelic micro-dosing in an attempt to find that missing creativity.

Perhaps those Boro followers who decide on making the trip to Ipswich will contemplate the starting line-up as they picture themselves on a train in a station, with plasticine supporters with working class ties, suddenly someone is there at the turnstyle, a girl with kaleidoscope eyes – who then scans their ticket as they are ushered into the away end. A chorus of “Lewis in the side with diamonds”, such as the still rough cut Tavernier, is no doubt what they will be hoping to hear – although Sgt. Pulis may not be quite ready to give his lonely band of strikers some much needed company from midfield and they may have to get by with just a little help from George Friend and Ryan Shotton’s long throws.

Talking of an altered state of mind, the smouldering Aitor Karanka returns to the Riverside on Saturday with his team of still possibly merry men at Forest. The Tricky Trees have made steady if unspectacular progress this season as they sit comfortable in mid table after drawing six and losing just the one game at sixth-place Brentford. Karanka’s side have surprisingly only failed to score in one game this season and that unsurprisingly was against Swansea in a goalless draw. Former Bournemouth striker and last season Villa loanee, Lewis Grabban, has also started finding the net for his new club with four goals in his last three games.

Still, the former Boro manager must be looking rather enviously towards Tony Pulis with just four goals conceded this term – Bilbao Baggins, down in the Nottingham shire, will still surely covet his precious clean sheets. Few will be expecting a goal-fest when these sides meet but hopefully some Boro players will still be highly motivated to put one over on their old gaffer. Anyway, after the spectre of typical Boro revealed itself in all its lack of glory at Hull last Saturday, let’s hope this week sees a return to intensity on the pitch and some signs that creativity can be delivered in more than just microscopic doses.